I love meeting new people and getting to know all different kinds.
I think it mostly stems from moving every other year from military base to military base growing up. You learn quickly to make friends and make friends fast, because you know it won’t last long.
I get attached to friends and want to see the best in everyone around me, leaving me to be constantly letdown. It may also come from my own mental health issues: my anxiety of wanting to never be wrong or make mistakes or my bipolar that tends to have me make plans with people during a manic episode, to only come down and succumb to my depression later on.
I recently went to the RuPaul’s Drag Race Battle of the Seasons, alone. My loving boyfriend had bought two tickets for my birthday. As happy as I was when I received them, my anxiety went into overdrive. I have recently coined myself an introverted extrovert. I’m fun and outgoing, but only around people I’m comfortable with and when I feel like being outgoing. Of my very few friends, who was going to ask to come? Would I be better off going alone as I have gotten so used to doing? I asked around of course, however, I was letdown as usual. So I decided to get dolled up and go it alone.
I have found a haven within the Blerd community, people like me and it makes me feel safe and surrounded by people who are not only like-minded with similar interest, but a group of people who actually genuinely care.
Self-care is a term that means the health decisions you take into account to maintain your physical and mental health. It’s different for everyone. As much as people take care of their physical health, the mental is just as important. My go-to phrase in dealing with self-care deals more with the emotional and that’s “Learn to say yes to yourself.” So I say yes when I want to see a movie I want alone, I say yes when I want to go from comic book store to comic book store ALONE. I say yes to letting people go and lowering my expectations of people to avoid being letdown.